I hear so many great ideas and methods for success. They are from a variety of sources and have an even wider variety of application. It’s seems that most of the advice about how to manage time, resources, people, difficulties, challenges, setbacks, and any of the day-to-day challenges are presented from more of a ‘reflective’ position. Specifically, very few people write about those challenges in the moment and really display the full range of emotion, internal conflict, and real depth of the struggles. That seems to be the only part that really matters. Once an idea is distilled, reflected, or otherwise summarized to have the largest possible application, it can leave the reader somewhat confused regarding if or how the advice, technique or model really applies to their situation. It also seems to me that these ideas are typically presented as a singular action or focus that will impact and shape a person’s context or reality and create the results they desire. There is no silver bullet that works every time. Not there, doesn’t exist. The reality is that most of these topics really are different presentations of the same core theory or idea. The difficulty for most people is not in theory or method, the core difficulty for myself and the people I know is application. How do I apply this idea to my situation? Does this idea or technique actually apply to my situation?

I don’t have the answer, and I’m starting to think and believe that there really is no ‘right’ answer for every situation. Everything comes back to and down to each individual deciding how best to apply an idea to their life. There’s really no one size fits all method that works for everyone because everyone is different and situations are different for everyone.

What is critical and really matters, it seems, is that each person take the initiative to examine possible solutions, explore the ramifications, then make a decision for themselves. Unfortunately, it seems that most people I’ve observed, with a variety of levels of engagement, are constantly looking for some kind of external answer to their situation. That seems to be the norm. I believe the reason for seeking an answer externally is wrapped up in fear. If the decision is out of my control, then the results are because of X situation or Y person. It’s fundamentally a means to deflect responsibility and blame something other than oneself for the ramifications of a decision or situation. Sometimes, that is the reality. There are plenty of things that are far beyond our ability to directly control or influence, and we must accept that. I do believe however that there is a large volume of decisions and results that are much more within our control than most people accept. As a result, visions are limited, results are limited, and our overall human potential is held back.

Bottom line, I believe that true individual power and influence is completely unlocked and released the more we accept the responsibility to extrapolate our own conclusions on reality and our decisions. Consume all of the ideas and theories around a decision, examine how each theory, and each portion and assumption around the theory, applies to your situation. Then make any necessary adjustments to the theory and move forward. This requires a new strength of character and will to believe that you can answer those questions for yourself and that you do not need some kind of external validation or force (another person or circumstances) to make the decision for you. This requires letting go of all the need to please another person or group of people and just doing what makes sense and is right for you, within the culturally acceptable moral framework. It also requires letting go of any pride in authorship or ownership of an idea. If you’re getting the result you’re after, what does it matter who gets the credit?

Take advice with the clear idea that it will need to be personalized to apply to you. No matter what anyone says and or how close that person is to you or your situation, the decision must still come from within.

There is no right answer for every situation, so stop looking for one! There is no right answer for every situation, so stop thinking you’re going to let someone down!

Free yourself to make decisions that fit for you. As you step into and through those decisions you can make course adjustments along the way, that is a natural part of this process.